So I flew back to UK on the glorious 'National Carrier' 2 weeks ago & for once I wasn't dreading mealtimes like I usually do.
For one, there was a grand total of maybe 20 people in the whole of Cattle Class. (20 people!!! Something is definitely not right there.) But less people = less airline food smell in a pressurised, enclosed space. Yeuucchh!! Even the thought of it makes my stomach turn.
As you can probably imagine, an aversion to airline food is fine on a 3, 4 or even 5 hour flight but a bit of a nightmare on a 12 - 13 hour flight.
But this time, I thought I had hit on the perfect solution. On our trip back from HK on China Airlines, we sat across the aisle from these two Indian guys. Boy, were they dodgy, but that's another story...
They had a special meal that looked & smelled fantastic. I leaned over & asked them what it was & they told me they has ordered 'Indian Vegetarian' special meals. They had some capattis, dhal, a nice salad & were saying things like 'This is the best meal!', 'Ask for one next time...', 'Ask the flight attendant if they have any more, tell them you are my friend, I'm sure they'll do for you...'
Unfortunately, they my new friend didn't have that much clout with the attendents & they didn't have any extra meals on that flight but I resolved to order it for the trip back to UK.
So, I was looking forward to my 'Indian Vegetarian' meal. I love Indian food and had visions of mamak stall quality stuff, forgetting who I was flying with. Oh, what a deluded fool I was.
All was going well, I had my emergency exit seat so my legs weren't twisted into pretzels, plenty of elbow room as the OP next to me had gone off to sleep on the empty seats & they were calling me 'Mr Kong this... Mr Kong that...' probably cause there were that few people on board we'd transformed from cattle to actual people.
The first meal comes along and another advantage of special meals is you get served first. Rubbing my hands in anticipation, I look down & find:
2 small, thick round pieces of what I can only describe as oven mitts in looks & taste
1 small chick pea salad with maybe 5 peas
a forgettable dessert of some description (forgotten what it was already, it was so good!)
and in the main meal was:
a few measly strands of french beans in watery curry
a LOT of rice
and the main attraction, in the corner there - 1 fried cube of taufu
ONE CUBE OF TAUFU!
They could not even stretch to 2 cubes, or even 1 1/2 cubes... sigh...
Feeling extremely disappointed, I finished what I could (it still tasted slightly better that the normal plane food) and left the rest. Then I went back to the normal routine of sleeping, reading, watching movies, being extremely bored etc etc
After some hours, the second meal was served. I looked down to find:
2 small, thick round pieces of what I can only describe as oven mitts in looks & taste
1 small chick pea salad with maybe 5 peas
a forgettable dessert of some description (forgotten what it was already, it was so good!)
and in the main meal was:
a few measly strands of french beans in watery curry
a LOT of rice
and the main attraction, in the corner there - ...
...eh? Where's my cube of taufu?!! It was missing! Gone, disappeared, vanished, magicked out of existence - poof!
They could not even provide the 1 taufu for the second meal! What the heck!?!!! I know they are cost cutting, but this is ridiculous!
So I just pushed the meal away in disgust & from now when I fly the National Carrier, I'll have to go back to my fasting policy...
On top of my plane meal
All covered in ghee
I lost my poor taufu
when MAS flew 'cross the sea
It rolled on the table
And on to the floor
And then my poor taufu
Rolled out the galley door
(sung to the tune of 'On Top Of Spaghetti' aka
'On Top Of Old Smoky' )
Mr Kong
(Mrs Kong insisted I identify it was me ranting and not her - I take full responsibility)
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